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Special Skills:
- Sleeps pretty good on airplanes.
- Totally OK with sitting in the middle back seat.
- Knows every word to Jay-Z’s “I Just Wanna Love You.”
- Able to lift slightly more than you’d think.
- Oblivious to sexual harassment.
― Excerpt from Xiomara Morales Resumé, File #14119, Apple One Temp Agency, Classified: DO NOT EMPLOY.
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Opinions
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"I used to like regular people, until I discovered certain areas of the internet... Now I sort of hope you all die in a fire. Especially the ones who developed 'wiki-code'."
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"I, for one, think loitering about, occasionally bowing and scraping to the nobility is a non-stop fun explosion. Let me just pencil that in on my calendar next to pubic waxing and the recreational tooth extraction I had scheduled."
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Dashiel
Good taste in underwear. One of those rich investor types! That means he's given me an influx of seed capital... if you know what I mean.
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Chandler
She's super smart, super nice, super generous, super hot, super everything, which kind of makes me feel super-fucking-pathetic in comparison... She's one of those medical professionals. That means she likes to play doctor.... if you know what I mean.
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Mitzi
When I learned she was a psychiatrist, I was a little nervous- but she smoothed it all out when she suggested I get a job taking my clothes off and shaking my tits at strangers. She's got a good head on her shoulders. That means she knows how to make things happen.... if you know what I mean.
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Sumter
We met only once, but I've decided already that I should ask him to Netflix and Chill. That means I want to invite him over and have sex with him on the couch... if you know what I mean.
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Austin_Fitzgerald
We met in a shitty pool hall. He whisked me back to a five-star hotel room so we could spend a lovely evening together. When we got there, he made me breakfast, but the sausage was undercooked and flaccid, despite sucking on it for two hours straight... if you know what I mean.
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| Race:
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Changeling
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| Full Name:
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Xiomara Morales
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| Seeming:
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Grump
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| Court:
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Unseelie <3
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| Seelie Legacy:
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Philanthropist
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| Unseelie Legacy:
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Cerenaic
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| Kith:
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Pooka (Awoooooo)
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| Apparent Age:
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Mid 20's
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| Height:
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5' 1"
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Prospect Roasters
Xiomara has become a fixture here because her bestest friends are often here. So, you can often find her here!
Looking for Work
Xiomara has some distinct disadvantages when finding employment, like being a compulsive liar, but maybe you can look past those inadequacies and hire her.
Shameless & Hedonistic
Xio is not shy, loves attention, and has very little self introspection... this is a recipe for really bad decisions which you can TOTALLY take advantage of!
Clumsy AF
Xio is a top-heavy, easily distracted woman with bad eye-hand coordination - schedule a time for her to literally trip over you. Hilarity guaranteed to ensue or your money back.
Molecular Biologist
Xio has a Ph.D. in molecular biology and has invented various cures for deadly diseases as outlined in the New England Journal of Medicine and the award winning publication: 'Cooties, are they real?' in the Elsevier Journal of Molecular Biology.
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