2021-06-27 Fair Food is Fair Game

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Raiding the Fairs Food Court.
IC Date 27nd of June, 2021
Players Harvey, Gogh as Fairy Foodmother, aka the ST. Perfection & Nova the Wooflet
Location The Fair
Prp/Tp One off funny
Spheres Ratkin / Wyld / Gaian / BOO WEAVER!
Theme Song -


Is it not true a leader shall bring their pack to the Promised Land? To the Greatest of Places? Gogh had chattered about this for weeks, claiming that a True Place of Wonder was coming to town. Now, scampering through secret ways, she leads her pack ... to the food court of the Regional Fair, peering from under a trash can and chittering excitedly ~See? SEE?~ she squeaks

Secret ways. The dark paths. The tunnels and the holes. Harvey had been away from the ground for too long! Too much time spent flying his new invention around, using his Fetish battery to power it. But the promise of Wonder was too great a thing to pass up so he followed the Leader along. He pushes in under the Sleek rat and pokes his head out from under and between its front legs. Whiskers twitch as all the things are smelled, ~So much of it. All of it.~

Promises of Wonder lead to Great Quests and Adventures, it is known. So Perfection, back from whatever umbral outing she'd gone on, is happy to scurry along, watching with those deep, enigmatic eyes of hers, taking in the sights, squeaking excitedly and lopping in little circles. ~It will belong to us! All will belong to us!~ She proudly declares with twitching whiskers.

~We must gather all the sugary things we can~ Gogh decrees, sniffing ~So much! Bring all home for ratlings to help them grow stronger and learn there are good and fun things to chew!~ That this might encourage her children to, y'know, go on insane sugar rushes does not seem to occur to the Knife Skulker

The black rat continues to peer at the area from under their hiding spot, ~Sausuages. We must have sausages.~ he replies to this, ~Must make a plan. One for the sugar. One for the meat and the other for the breadthings.~ he pulls his head back a bit.

The Perfect Pale Rat is still hidden under the trash can with her compatriots. She licks at her paw and appears to be scribbling in the air as though she had a notepad. Munchmausen. What will they think of next. ~...Sugary snacks.... Sausages... And sasparilla.~ She blinks. ~What is sasparilla?~

The tiny grey rat nods, and she concentrates. Tugging a tiny, rodent-sized gym bag from nowhere, she puts it on the ground and opens it up - to a vastly larger space ~We shall fill this! Our Fine Engineer, Find Us The Crunchiest Sausages! Our Pretty Perfection, sugary substances shall sustain us! I will find the bread~ gogh chitters ~And maybe

Yep. The trio of rats are planning a food heist. Because food from a Fair can be very good food and rats do appreciate good food! Sometimes, one gets tired of eating the grey gruel porridge known to be consumed. Made from trash. And other things. Yuck. The black rat lets out another squeaky sound, ~Sausages. I will take them all. They shall be ours.~ he pauses to sniff in the air, ~I can scent them from here. They are not far.~

~Sugary treats for the sugar skull throne! Sasparilla flowing sweet for the-~ The Pale Rat runs off, squeaks deflating into air without really coming closer to any meaning. Alas.

Gogh scurries off, secret plots no doubt sounding in the tiny rodent's magnificient mind. The little bag is there, for the heists to be deposited in.

Then she peeks back. She has donned a scrap of disguising paper over her face. It has a little section of the American Flag on it. More scraps of paper are thrown for her pack, and then she vanishes again. Stealth mode!

The black rat watches his two rat-fam's going separate ways to find treats. The little engineer then decides to find the sausages he is scenting. He choses a wall to begin to follow, looking for places to hide in under, to avoid people spotting him.

Sights, sounds, smells and PETS! This place full of humans has everything! Or, at least, thats what the H U G E dog wandering through the fairgrounds thought, not knowing there was a massive area dedicated to everything unhealthy in relations to FOOD! Coming up from behind the trashcan that the rats had just left, coincidentally enough. Her huge size makes it REALLY hard to sneak around. She stands there, behind the can, looking around, trying to see what there is. Anything unguarded... Her black nose twitches, eyes scan.... Lowering her head, she sniffs along the ground, and moves forward into the place proper, trying to pick up any sausagey scents...

TREASURE! Perfection has found TREASURE! Right now she's running in circles by one of the stands, smelling popcorn and other sweetness, but she sees a glass cage, a large glass cage, with a funnel and strands of sugar that are being collected into clouds, the little rodent that could making starry eyes, wholly distracted for a bit - until she notices the dog. The dog. Yes. Good dog. She makes a couple of squeaky noises at the dog, then runs around herself again, and slips into the confectionary tent to study the amazing contractions the humans are using to make their sweet things - at which point she discovers a shelf full of the clouds of pink sweetness.

The Black Rat is hunting for meat. For TASTY MEAT. What he finds ... someone is already cooking sausages. There is a griller, where someone has left an open bag of hot dogs beside it, and he can scurry up the back of a stall to see it. There are already Hot Dogs turning brown under the glowing heat elements, and there is busy noise and hands coming to grab them. There are scents of sauces, of mustard, but overall, there is that scent of Suspicious Fairground Meat. Possibly Pork Related But Don't Bet On It. Perfection finds the Cotton Candy Cloud Confectionary Contraption! Here, white sugar spins and coelesces into pink, sticky, wonderful things that look as though they could float away, and are being stuffed into plastic bags and piled up on a shelf. Clever human hands work at the machine, watched by vacant-eyed children. Nova, though, the Big Dumb Dog That's Clearly Not As Smart As A Rat, Okay, sees both things, and is decidedly better received than either of the Noble Magic Rats would be. Kids with sticky hands pet and fuss her as she wanders, and adults tug them away as they whine and cry.

Oh, this is just too good to be true. The little black engineer rat does indeed scurry up the back of the stall, using the power of Crawling Chaos. He then finds himself a good vantage point to stare down at the food. The food being grilled is not the stuff he is after. It is the bag with the ungrilled ones that he wants. He just needs to find the right time to grab them. The idea is simple! Drop down when no one sees, knock the bag off the stall, then grab it and drag for all his worth!

The Pale Rat sits in the Confectionary Tent, a little overwhelmed; bags with fluffy clouds of sugar! With popcorn! SO MUCH! It is enough to drive a little Munchmausen to a moment of Zen, but eventually, well - she needs to get to work. Considering that the confectionary humans are kind enough to pre-prepare bags it would be a crime to ignore their select work, even if part of her mind screams to undo the cloud machine from the bottom and become as a sugary god by spinning through the funnel and covering her ratty body in - Struck by divine inspiration, Perfection slips under the sugar-spinny machine to find a way in.

Nova wasnt so distracted by all the pets and attention from random strangers that she didnt see that small fuzzy thing stop and squeak at her! It was something she's never really seen before. She's seen the smalls before, but never have they stopped to make a noise! It didnt seem like a hostile gesture, so she takes it as a friendly one! She would've followed, but going under the tent wouldve been hard due to the size of the hole, so instead, she goes around it, peering at all the FOOD! She lifts herself, putting her paws on the counter, and cranes her neck to try to scoop up some loose meats or other snacks!

Harvey dangles for a few moments, the black rat half-hidden in the shadows at the back of the stall, and then he plummets. The pack of hotdogs sways on the counter for a moment, and then the Engineer's clever little hands snatch it as he descends! It lands atop him with a meaty THUD. (Please roll stamina to soak 1 bashing damage.)But now, the griller goes to grab another hot dog, and only then, with annoying human slowness, looks confused at the lack of them! And he starts to look around and down! Perfection sneaks in. She is pale, and it helps, as she begins to scurry on the spinners. Her clever paws scamper on them, as wisps of cotton candy coelesce around her, fluffying and building until she's ready to almost float away! Then someone sticks a stick firmly into the cloud, but she easily grasps it. Nova finds a stall that smells of OHMYGODMEATTHISISMEATTHERE'SMEATHERE. The big doofus of an animal rears up to her hind legs and snatches at what turns out to be HALF A DAMN PIG that's roasting on a spittle. It comes away in her TERRIBLE JAWS, leaving a trail of spittle, juices, and boiling fat that drips behind as people begin to throw things at her. And yell! There's yelling! (Please roll to soak 1 bashing)

SUCCESS! The sausages are his! An entire package of them to put on the grill later! Or just eat as they are! The Engineer ignores all caution as all he wants is the sausages. He just tumbles off the stall and on to the ground and finds himself on his back with the entire pack ontop of him! Quickly, he twists around to get on his quick little paws before he bites into the pack and then makes a bold for it! He goes for the small, narrow areas under tables and stalls, hoping no one can catch him as he makes a break for it for where they started from!

WHEEE goes the pale pink cloud of cotton candy spinning around in the tumbler, avoiding the blades of death and quickly getting very dizzy. Then there is stick! STICK! STICK MEANS FREEDOM! So Perfection regains her balance by grabbing onto the stick, and once she and her cloud of fluffy pink sweetness escapes the whirlbox of doom, she will squeak triumphantly and leap even triumphantlier into the air to dash towards the ground where she will surely get lost in the chaos and thus escape effortlessly to make her delivery. Yes, she can picture it in her mind even now*

  • Mind images may be closer than they appear and also completely different from what goes down in reality.

Nova was expecting some kind of score, but... she isnt sure what she got! Looks vaguely familiar to her, but the darkened skin and the fact that its half of what it once was. She'd be completely heartbroken if she were able to recognize what she has in her maw, but she drags it away, the objects being thrown at her bouncing off of her floof, dealing little damage if any. Dragging it away, back to the trash can where she first scouted the place, setting it down with herself sitting down, looking at the people giving her mean looks!

Harvey zooms! Hotdogs are dragged in a package, and a scrap of paper fastens across his face. It doesn't cover his eyes, but there's red below and white above. He dodges! He dives! He drags! And the little gym bag is there, with Gogh stuffing a Size 10 Package of Hot Dog Buns into a Size 1 bag. Truly, these gym bags can carry so much. The Cotton Candy Ball begins to zoom. Perfection picks up speed. Then an errent foot catches her. A gust of wind helps. There's a LOT of surface area there, and the Pale Rat tumbles, end over end - right over a package of chocolates which stick to the candy, as she tumbles into the hiding spot below the wheeled trash can, just as evening hits and lights flash up everywhere. And music fills the air. Ratamari Perfarcy Indeed. Nova finds comfortable trash and has ALREADY found Tasty Tasty Meat. There are scowling people who look at her as she settles and finds Crunchy Flesh to chew. One of them looks set to go to kick the dog - but is stopped by another, who touches the first's arm. They make noises at one another, arguing. The food is far more interesting

Fast. Quick. Faster. Quicker! This along with the Mission Impossible theme-song, switched out for something free to share due to copyright laws! Thats what you would get when watching the little Engineer rat as he makes his getaway with the package of sausages! Its some real intense stuff happening with him, from how he hides behind that thing, rolls over that shoe and hops over some thing on the ground! All the while, trying to not be noticed by human eyes before it is too late for them to realise what it was that just ran past with a large bunch of sausages in a package! He does not stop until he tumbles in under the trashcan once more, a somewhat ungraceful arrival.

Perfection slips into the bag. Or onto the bag. The point is, she goes where the bag is and begins to scoop sticky fluff of herself, and even washing herself and bringing chocolate and chirping happily, making up a sibilant song about sugar and sugary treats, running around in circles chasing her own tail, with a few fluffs of pink where she cannot reach. Twitching her whiskers at Harvey and Gogh. ~I BRING THE SWEET!~ She squeaks, triumphant!

~You are the sweet!~ Gogh proclaims to the Munchmausen, staring in disbelief and shaking her head ~You will have to share the story of how you gathered the cloud!~ She looks suitably amazed, finishing her stuffing and letting Harvey get to work stuffing food in as well. And considering the Cotton Candy again. Then asking the Engineer ~... think she's in there?~

Nova does indeed go to town on the pig, tearing off chunks of flesh and swallowing it. She hasnt eaten this well in a LOOONG time! Any rats nearby would ear the crunch of the skin and the chewing sounds from the hungry doge, just enjoying her meal. Its a half a pig, there is lots to share, if anything came by to take a bite or a few dozen! She doesnt or wouldnt really mind or maybe even notice. Hard to tell.

The little engineer rat (well, not THAT little really) drags the package of liberated sausages over to The Gogh to be safely stored in the bag of holding! His eyes then turn to the fluffy cloud of fluffyness, ~So very pink.~ he says, ~How did that get here? Does.. does the cotton candy have legs?!~ he begins, then turns around, ~And is that a huge dog eating a roasted pig?~ he peers, ~Where did that dog come from?~ he looks to the cloud of cotton candy, ~Where did that cloud of cotton candy come from?~ So many questions. Too many questions.

Perfection poses as she tears chunks of pink to toss at the body. "It is I, LeClerq!" She declares, raising a bit of glasses-shaped candy from her face which... Well, it would work better if she wasn't still inside the pink cloud. "I do hear crunching but I can see very little. It does smell like burnt pork and dog, though. And sugar. Lots of sugar." The latter may be a localised affair.

Gogh shakes her tiny ratty head. She is confused and no little amount exasperated by the madness around her. She bundles as much of the food as she can into the bag, and moves to heft it ~We should return~ She confides ~And we will need to clean SOMEONE WHO FELL INTO FOOD~ a click of her teeth at Perfy. Rude.

~I did not fell. I leapt. And then, I flew on winds of spun sugar. And it was a journey towards heavens made of pink clouds and endless sweetness.~ The slowly emerging pale-pink rat professes. Clicking her teeth back at Gogh and twitching sticky whiskers at her.

Feeling her belly getting full, Nova takes a break from DEVOURING the hog, looking around, the din of people conversing and playing, distant screams of joy and terror as people play on spinning things that swing them around. There is something more... local, however. at the trash can. She sniffs the air, and lowers her head down to where she can hear something, a squeaking noise, lots of it, from under. She lowers, and peers into the place, seeing the group of rats, one covered in cotton candy. The big eye just stares at them, while her tail starts to wag! This is something else!

Perfection pauses in her un-pinkifying of herself, looking at the looming eye. She clears her throat, and twitches her whiskers, moving closer to the big creature.

~Yes, hello,~ She squeak-barks, in a very poor attempt at sounding like a canine. ~This is dog.~