Aliana/Infobox
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| Name: | Aliana Parton |
| Age: | 22 |
| Nationality: | Finnish |
| Position: | The Help |
| Demeanor: | Confidant |
| Flaws: | Absent-Minded; Airhead |
| Talents: | Cooking, Courtesy, and Waterboarding |
| Employ: | Executive Valet and Maid for Mrs. Crane |
| Consecrated to: | ANGU the CRUEL |
A simple country girl from Juujärvi in a terribly inbred nest of degenerate Kinfolk, Aliana is kind of a success story. She was scouted for her special connection to terror and madness and then everyone realized she wasn't particularly good at things. So why not train her to be a maid?
There's just been a string of employers she's been assigned to that came to terrible ends. Can't be helped!
